Na verdade Todd está tentando monopolizar a atenção, ser mais importante do que é, e no processo está sendo egoista e usando (talvez) de "sincericídio"; isto tem zero de tato.   No final, essa atitude não o levará a lugar algum, ou precisamente aonde ele menos quer.

      No meu entender a palavra "tooling" fosse inventada, teria que ser para definir o cara sofrendo ''bullying'' (being a tool), se fosse pelo conceito apresentado a seguir. 

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     I don´t think the proper concept here is "tooling", see what a tool means:

     http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=tool
Tool:
Someone who is a complete idiot/ one who is used by other people, and usually dosen't even realize it/ someone who can't think
for themselves/ an asshat.

     Maybe Todd is right, his behaviour have to do with some bad experiences with John et cetera, maybe John has been naughty in some way before...
     But let´s assume the given context is the one you present to us (that is, Todd is a manipulating, inconsiderate, egotistical and attention-seeker guy).
      He is trying to rally their mutual buddies against Toddy, by influencing their behaviour and actions in his favor, and against those of John; perhaps Toddy is insecure and  needs to draw attention to himself by making John look bad.

     If Toddy persists nagging and nagging, keeps pushing and hard presses John and others in every situation, even if it has nothing to the girls, maybe  he will do it to them to.   If he stabs John in the back, perhaps he´ll stab other friends in the back too.

     The girls should keep observing his ways then, and, at their discretion they would take the reigns and let him know that they don´t appreciate that, but at their discretion (they may have another course of action too depending of the circumstances, of course). 

      If so, they would explain him that if he is a friend of them he doesn´t have to care about their choices of friends, and no matter which influence it´s them the ones to choose.
      So, (he) please stop talking as much crap as him wants, and discuss their issues wich each other.   Or else he will be the one the is going to look bad, and that they will break off the friendship if they don´t come to a resolution, or keeps bikering.
        Tell him that you are willing to forgive him but you if this situation occurs again, they will cease to be friends with her.  If he shifts to behaving well, they may be happy and nice, or else...

         They may also let him know that the more anybody appear to be going to great lengths to persuade somebody about something the least persuasive he will be.

          Please, feel free to offer corrections, comments on my text.   You guy know well that my English sucks!

           PP.